⚠️ This is a mockup of the village WhatsApp group. The real one is far too noisy to display here.
Ethel Bunk
Just spotted a ferret stealing turnips again! 🦦😠
10:12 AM
You
Can someone pass the chutney? The last batch was terrible.
10:15 AM
Ned Chutney
Possibly better if you use less gravel this time. 🤔
10:18 AM
Mrs Crumble
Anyone seen my spoon? Last time it disappeared near the riverbank during the full moon... 🌝🥄
10:22 AM
You
I think the turnips are talking at night. Heard a secret meeting just yesterday.
10:25 AM
👍
Big Bob Spurtle
That explains the dancing Morris ghosts. 🕺👻
10:30 AM
Trish from the Shop
Just sold a bag of mystery stew mix. No one’s come back yet. 🤞
10:35 AM
You
Has anyone seen my missing left boot? It ran off again last night.
10:40 AM
Old Man Shufflebottom
If it starts talking, let me know. I’ve got a couple of good stories about boots.
10:42 AM
You
Does the hedgehog still owe me for that jam jar?
10:45 AM
Keith the Confused
I just accidentally emailed a potato. Again. What even is the internet?
10:47 AM
Linda the Lark
Singing birds seem less confused than Keith. Just saying. 🎶
10:50 AM
You
Wonder if the turnip rebellion is planning a coup.
10:53 AM
Farmer Tibbs
I’ve got my pitchfork ready, just in case. 🚜
10:55 AM
— End of archived messages —
Linda the Lark is typing...